Did you know that whatever you've experienced in your life thus far has, in one way or another, been in direct response to something that you have believed? I know what you're going to say next. "But, Dora, my experiences have made me believe in certain things." To which I will reply, you've got it backwards. In fact, first you would have had to believe in something as being true for you, which then created your experience of your reality, which you then used to justify your beliefs even more as "proof."
Now, this might sound a lot like self-blame. After all, it can seem like life just happens "to you" beyond your control. But you have to understand the role that you are playing in your own life's circumstances, not out of self-blame, but out of self-empowerment. So many times I have heard people equate self-empowerment with self-blame but, in truth, the two couldn't be farther apart.
Blaming yourself means defining yourself and your choices and actions as being "wrong." No such thing! Nothing is inherently "wrong" or "right." It just IS. WE are the ones who get to attach meaning to everything. And that means that we can also choose our own perspectives. So, if you know that you are THAT powerful that your beliefs, and subsequent thoughts, feelings, and actions, can create your own reality, how can that be anything but empowering?
Whatever you believe becomes your experienced truth. Now, you might say that some things are just true regardless of whether or not we believe in them. And on the surface this may appear to be true. Like gravity, for instance. As much as you want to deny its existence, it still exists, in this realm, anyway. However, you could also choose to believe that you can defy gravity, and then THAT can be true for you too. Have you ever seen those rock climbers who hang on by a nail and jump from rock to rock as if they are flying? Have you ever watched paragliders? Have you ever been on a plane? How does gravity function in space? How about floating in water? Gravity may seem like an absolute truth, but there are always ways to experience it differently.
And so, the hard part of changing a belief is not in choosing a new belief. It is in getting behind that belief without a shadow of a doubt. Now, usually, it takes proof of a belief being true in order to believe in it. This is, in fact, how we form our default programming. Over and over and over again we believe the same thing until it can't help but show up for us in our experience, which only validates that belief even more. Now, this can work both ways, either for our good or against it. But, either way, it means that we will need to program ourselves with a belief that we want in order to make it feel so real that, even without the initial "proof," we will still be able to get behind it, simply because it is something that we want to choose.
So, if something isn't working in your life, perhaps it's time to ask yourself, what do you actually believe about it? Then ask yourself, is this belief absolutely true? If so, how come? Who says? Where's the "rule" book on that? Then ask yourself, what do you actually want to believe? What do you actually want to be true for you? And, then, what's stopping you from choosing that belief over the other one? Think about it. What do you actually have to lose? At worst, nothing will change. So, really, it's only up from here.
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