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©2009-2019 by Dora Nudelman

Influencing Influencers

While everyone plays a pivotal role in being able to affect positive change in the world, much of the time the most wide-spread positive change starts at the top. As an influencer, you have the ability to facilitate rapid proactive shifts within your own life, which will then trickle down to our communities, but you must be at your best in order to be the most impactful.  


Whether at home, at work, and/or within your community, as someone with influence, power, authority, and connection, you have a great responsibility but also great power in your hands. As an influencer you likely often feel a great pressure to perform and lead by example. As a result, you also likely experience much stress and anxiety, which can unfortunately lead you to exhaustion and overwhelm. But by properly harnessing your innate power you can have a more profound and powerful impact on all those around you, while at the same time feeling at peace and content with your own place in the world.


While people from the outside looking in might envy your seemingly unaffected disposition, what they do not see or understand is the unique pressures you are faced with on a day-to-day basis. You are likely often unfairly judged and held to a standard far above the norm. But you are human too. Being at the top of your game comes with its own set of challenges that many influencers do not like to talk about for fear of appearing ungrateful, so these challenges are brushed off or swept under the rug, never talked about and often left unsettled. To add to the dilemma, feelings of guilt become the norm as does repression from the need to make sure everyone else is taken care of first. 


When we are given a platform we feel an increased pressure to be the perfect example for others to follow. But in order to be that example we must first figure out what makes us happy. Without inner contentment we can only give and do so much before we feel depleted and resentful.


Women in particular often feel an increased pressure to perform, to meet everyone's expectations, and to seem "perfect" the entire time. We still live in a largely male-dominated society and as women we still need to work harder to prove ourselves as worthy. Furthermore, instead of supporting one another, we often compete and compare, which causes all of us to feel even more anxious and on alert. But as women we need to support each other in our dreams and endeavors and to be there for each other as we face criticism and doubt from the outside world. 


Imagine what it would feel like to just be true to ourselves without having to worry about gaining the approval and validation of others. Why are we are still trying to prove to others and to ourselves that we deserve our place in the world? Let's simply enjoy it instead. But the more defensive we are, the less we believe in ourselves. As it stands women are expected to be super-human. So let's prove them right. Let's become empowered and unstoppable in what we can achieve together, and have fun along the way too.


I have always felt like I was entrusted with a big mission in my life, and while it wasn't always clear to me what that mission was, I knew it had something to do with helping elevate others to see their full potential. I have always been a consciousness-raiser of sorts, and I have always felt the need to lead by example, often setting myself to the highest of standards. But many times this led me to inflict great pressure and stress on myself, which actually depleted my ability to lead and help others like I wanted to.


But over the years I have learned to be kinder to myself, knowing that by making sure that I am taken care of, this would enable me to make the most impact on others as well. I am a perfectionist and an over-achiever and have often felt the weight of the world on my shoulders. I have felt the pressure to please and felt guilty for saying "no" when needed. I have placed my own needs and desires on the back-burner to ensure that everyone else got what they wanted. I have been expected to know all, be all, and to do better and lead by example. And I have put undue pressure on myself to be "perfect," unaffected, and to perform up to everyone else's expectations. 


So I understand what it feels like to have the desire and ability to fulfill a great purpose but also to be scared to wits about failing at it. I understand what it feels like to give my all only to be left tired, depleted of energy, and resentful. And I understand what it feels like to sacrifice my own needs and desires in order to please others. I have learned, however, to put myself first from time-to-time without feeling guilty for it because I know that through honoring my own desires I am better able to serve others as well. 

"You cannot get sick enough to help sick people get better. You cannot get poor enough to help poor people thrive. It is only in your thriving that you have anything to offer anyone. If you’re wanting to be of an advantage to others, be as tapped in, turned in, turned on as you can possibly be." Abraham Hicks


Being a positive influencer has always been on my agenda. But to be able to help other nurturers and influencers, especially women, to create more balance, fulfillment, and peace in their own lives makes me feel like I am making an even greater impact on the world. By helping impactful women connect to their inner voice and power I feel I am also helping them fulfill their purpose with ease and contentment. Through creating a safe, non-judgmental space I provide women with a positive outlet through which they can become more self-empowered, self-assured, secure, and genuinely happier from the inside.


What I love about influencing nurturing and engaging women is that they inherently know their true worth and are not afraid to invest in themselves to fulfill their greatest potential. They do not settle for mediocrity and they do not take "no" for an answer. However, sometimes in the process they forget to "breathe," which is why sometimes they do need a reminder of how truly great they are. They want to be the best and do the best but sometimes their zest turns into overwhelm, exhaustion, and anxiety. However, determined to succeed I know that these women are the perfect candidates to receive new perspectives in order to grow, learn, and advance in any ways they desire in life. 

Mastering Alignment